Baseball’s Greatest Mimbos: The Final Countdown

Cue the dramatic music and dim the lights, ’cause this is it, folks. It’s the end of the line… the final revealing of my carefully meditated selections of the top mimbos in the majors. If you missed the first installments, here are Part One and Part Two.

Deciding the top four was, quite honestly, a cinch. For me, these four mimbos tower far above the rest. They set the mimbo standard. The difficult part was determining which order to put them in. I switched them around more than a few times and, aside from number one, I’m still not sure I have it all right. But what’s done is done! Without further ado, allow me to introduce you to the cream of the mimbo crop!

#4: Eric Byrnes (Arizona Diamondbacks) I made a promise regarding Eric Byrnes in my very first post. Though it’s a struggle, I’m going to have to move on without further comment.

#3: Nick Swisher (New York Yankees) I had multitudes of photographs to choose from to illustrate to you the superior mimboness of Nick Swisher. But if a picture is worth a thousand words then mustn’t a video be worth even more than that?

#2: Bronson Arroyo (Cincinnati Reds) The hair… the music thing… commercials like THIS, which combine it all… Mr. Arroyo, you make me proud. I pop my collar in honor of you.


#1: Barry Zito (San Francisco Giants) I proclaim Mr. Zito to be the greatest mimbo in all the land! In fact, Mimbo is his middle name. Like Bronson Arroyo, he fancies himself a musician (Wanna hear a sample? You can do so by clicking here, but I don’t recommend it.) Like several of our previous mimbos, he also fancies himself a model. He has the hair. He has the attitude. Who could ask for more?

It’s been fun, guys. I’ll leave you, for now, with the complete Mimbo List, #’s 12-through-1.

12. Evan Longoria

11. Ryan Theriot

10. Chase Utley

9. Grady Sizemore

8. Jose Reyes

7. Cole Hamels

6. David Wright

5. C.J. Wilson

4. Eric Byrnes

3. Nick Swisher

2. Bronson Arroyo

1. Barry Zito


4 thoughts on “Baseball’s Greatest Mimbos: The Final Countdown

  1. Bronson Arroyo and cornrows = 1

    Too bad he got rid of them.

    Have to tip the hat to you on the list though. Pretty amazing and no problems with the list.

    You should find the “best” wives of MLB players. Kris Benson’s crazy wife should be hard to top.

  2. E! had a special on baseball wives a few months ago. I missed it, but yeah.

    Also, SABR is having a meeting on 1/30/2010 in Arlington. Costs 31 bucks to get in and I am going.

    Here is the link if you are interested:

    P.S. NatsFest is being held that week as well. I hope/wish that I could go so I could get Nyjer Morgan’s and Josh Willingham’s autographs : )

    • Mm… baseball events in the winter. Nothing could sound sweeter. I dream of one day being lucky enough to score Cubs Convention passes (and being not poor enough to go.) Someday… someday.

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