Week three of the major league season: In which some queer and rare things occurred, and in which the Cubs depressed and baffled us.
Around The Majors
Outstanding Outstandingness: I assume that everyone has seen this, the “Superman slide,” by now. But still… wouldn’t you like to watch it again? Maybe 5 or 6 more times?
“Sigh” Young Award: Joe Mather of the St. Louis Cardinals
Iron Horse: Yadier Molina caught every inning of the 20-frame Mets-Cardinals marathon affair on Saturday. I assumed he would be given the next day off, and was going to call him a pansy for it. But I just looked it up, and he played Sunday. And Monday. Cough.
Congrats Due To: Ubaldo Jiminez, for twirling the first no-hitter in Colorado Rockies history. Newborn boys and girls all over the Denver area are being christened “Ubaldo” in his honor.
Take A Chill Pill: Dallas Braden. Yeah.
Sign Of The Apocalypse: On Tuesday, Arizona ace Dan Haren allowed 7 runs and got the win while collecting 4 base hits for himself (hits which, sadly, don’t do my fantasy team a lick of good.)
Wipeout: The Brewers massacred the Pirates 20-0 yesterday. Poor Pirates… I can’t wait for the Cubs to play them.
Say!: The Yankees turned a triple play yesterday! It was the first time they’ve done so since 1968! The Athletics actually won that game, but that’s a mere triviality, isn’t it?
As For The Cubs…
Superheroes Of The Week: The starting pitchers. All five turned in quality starts this week. Bless you, starters… Blarters.
Kitten Eaters Of The Week: Whole team, minus the starting rotation, led by Alfonso Soriano.
On The Right Track: Geovany Soto has been hitting and walking and having generally delightful at-bats. If these continue, it would be a wunnerful thing.
Hug Of The Week: Poor Aramis is mired in the worst slump of his career. If a hug would cure it, I’d fly to Milwaukee and give him one.